The hay is scratchy through the material of my dress but I barely notice, mesmerised by the pretty girls dancing around the pole. Wrapping their ribbons this way and that. The fair buzzes around us, children laughing, pelting through the stalls and around the legs of adults drinking the all-important real ale and having conversations that burst into raucous laughter at the drop of a flat cap.
This is the nearest village, the one with the cosy pub and only store for miles around. Today is their May Fair, my first real fair and it’s so very exciting.
They’re starting to know us now, although it doesn’t worry Daddy like it did in the big cities. We tell them very little. I’ve learned that’s important. “No matter what they say Blade, just smile like a good girl.” So I do, I twirl my dress and I nod along to whatever they’re saying.
I don’t tell them where we live or what we do or how we came to be. But I do shake my head in mutual disapproval when they say, “That farm up the way, they used to bring their wares, you know… but how rude, they wrote us to say they don’t supply to us anymore. Tsk tsk.” I pretend to understand when they say they all shun them now based on letters received just after we arrived here.
“Two can play at that game.” The lady behind the till told me one day, shortly before slipping me a wink and an extra chocolate mouse in the paper-bag of goodies.
The kitty cat we adopted begged for them so prettily. They do that when mice are the only meal they can scavenge. “Like proper farm cats!” Daddy told me.
The lady waves at me as we pass, having set up a stall from her shop here in the field full of joyous celebration. There are lots of faces I don’t recognise too. “They come from the villages all around Blade.” Daddy whispers to me. Daddy knows so much.
I gaze up at him adoringly and almost walk full pelt into the nubile young thing in denim shorts. She’s dancing around in a circle of clones, the only difference the shade of plastic flowers in their hair.
“They come from all around,” Daddy explains, “for this…”
Gesturing at the handsome stage set up at the bottom of the field. It’s impressive, looking oversized in the humble field, with stacks of expensive looking equipment pushed to the side of the stage.
Right now there’s a solo singer and his guitar crooning into the microphone but it’s early still, not even the afternoon. I wonder what’s planned for later, who will put all the fancy amps to use.
Daddy pulls me to the side, under the shade of a tree and onto his lap. He speaks softly, directly into my ear. I listen intently, pretending not to be affected by his hand moving underneath my dress and wrangling my panties to one side.
“We’ve stumbled onto a gem my darkling… shhh now… don’t let them know, Daddy’s little secret… What we have here is an annual event, one that should be a tiny little village celebration, except of course, that every year, the band that made it big come back to play their home town.”
I squirm as he pushes rough fingers into the folds of Daddy’s flower. I don’t buck though, desperate as I want to. I keep my face calm. My dress spills out in a wide circle over my knees disguising the motion of Daddy’s hand inside of me.
“Thank goodness…,” he smiles, “for their misguided desire to stick to their roots.” He bites down gently now, making it look like a sweet kiss on my neck. A kiss with teeth.
“Thank goodness…” He laughs, “for the girls that follow them in flocks! Tonight my sweetness, those flocks become ours.”
A gasp from me gives away my closeness. “Wait.” He instructs, “….hold it.” Withdrawing too quickly and denying my release. “Not yet.” Daddy winks at me. “We have so much more fun to come.”
The fair provides all manner of innocent entertainment, hooking ducks, smashing plates and various shows provided by the local schools. The weather blooms into glorious afternoon sunshine, lubricating the alcohol flow and encouraging exposed skin, turning gently pink. Daddy keeps me in the shade mostly, watching, licking on ice lollies and sampling from the baking competition.
I’m confused when Daddy leads me away before the main event, as the field gets increasingly flooded with the same brand of teenage girl, all eager rampant hormones. The clothes get skimpier as they get older, much to the dismay and tutting of the village elders who slip away to the pub when the music begins to creep up.
“Why aren’t we staying Daddy? I like the music. I want to seeeee.” I complain, quick to correct myself. “Please, sir, if we may?” He simply shakes his head and continues on the path.
I recognise where we’re headed, it’s the same campsite we’ve been to before, the only one for miles around with occasional opportunity for play-friends. Daddy finds them, the drifters, camping on their own, the ones that won’t be missed. My Daddy could charm the birds from the trees if he chose to.
I recognise the entrance but I don’t recognise what lies within, there’s a whole other party here, tents fill the entire field, for as far as the eye can see. Music blasts from various points, the music lapping over each other like walking through a festival. Their inhabitants must be at the fair, besides the few crashed out under gazebos and tucked away in tents.
“This Blade, is where we gather our flock.”
I clap with glee. Daddy has done to so much work to prepare the studs, the bulls to breed our little farm. I’m eager for the patter of tiny paws, for baby animals to care for. Daddy has prepared me; it will be a lot of work, a lot of TLC for the animals. “Rearing isn’t for the faint hearted” He’d warned me, “You’ll have to be careful with them, not like your toys. These will be our livestock, our future.”
Confused I turn to face him, “But Daddy,” I query with innocent eyes. “How will we fetch them? We have no supplies, no rope, no shackles. How will we make them come?”
“With this, my sweetling.” He explains, opening his bag to reveal rows of little teeny plastic baggies with rocks of varying sizes filling them up.
“Love potion!” I exclaim. I remember this, I remember this from the city. Oooooh, this is exciting. This is different from usual, a new approach. Persuasion rather than coercion.
Sweeping in with the charm offensive Daddy finds an older girl with a big cigarette that smells funny hanging from between her fingers, she looks like she might be sleeping, slumped in the chair. That is until she pulls it to her mouth and takes a drag. She engages with my Daddy, of course she does, and she seems very interested in what he’s selling.
“Yeah fam,” I hear her begin, “We’ve been here for a few days ready for the gig, stocks are bare low. I know peeps that will buy for sure.” Without dismissing him she takes to her mobile, attached to a square device presumably to keep her connected out here in the sticks. She uses a vernacular I barely understand but manage to gather from context that we should wait.
She’s quite pretty really, with supple smooth legs and porcelain skin under the crochet top that barely covers her modesty. She finally removes her sunglasses to allow Daddy close enough to kiss her. She makes eye contact with me first, encouraged by my nods and smiles.
We don’t bother to move inside to privacy, the campsite deserted as it is and the warm sun turning tents into saunas at this time of day. Daddy continues to kiss her, tugging gently at her nipples, easily freed from the flimsy top. With a nod of consent I begin kisses up her thigh, she’s very open, keen to encourage us both. She even pulls her skirt up to allow my access, soft kisses where her underwear should be. She moans quietly, clearly accustomed to this kind of encounter, she’s barely phased at these strangers and their advances. I wonder if Daddy’s little sample is helping.
He provides a little more, a tiny white wrap with a tail that doesn’t even touch the sides. Her enlarged pupils engulf me as she pulls me in for a passionate kiss, one hand firmly under my jaw and the other attempting to free Daddy from his jeans.
I help her, like Daddy’s good girl. I help her with the buttons and then I help her by demonstrating, showing her how to move her tongue, combine it with her hands, synchronised on either side. She learns quickly, copying my deft movements.
Her throat is well trained too, she doesn’t hesitate in taking him all as I bury my licking tongue between Daddy’s legs. He keeps an encouraging hand on each of us, murmuring a quiet “Good girls”.
I’m sure her fingers working their way under my dress would be just as expert but I don’t get the opportunity to find out before we’re interrupted, her mobile emitting a jarring bleeping. “Sorry…” she offers, withdrawing her inquisitive hands to take the call.
Daddy kisses me deeply, praising my part in our seduction. “My clever girl.” he whispers as the girl yammers. Once again her vocabulary is alien to me, not that I want her words, my now bucking hips want her body, pressed up against me and writhing. I want to bite and scratch through her perfect skin and hear her scream with sweet agony…
It distracts my mind as I try to focus in on her words. Luckily Daddy demonstrates more control, tucking his still ragingly hard cock away subtly as they converse.
Our new farm family are on their way back.
We hear them before we see them in the fading light of the setting sun. Whooping and riled up, still singing the most popular of songs from the local-act-done-good. The move like a swarm, clearly imbibed on the indulgences of the fair. The smell of cheap cider buzzing around them.
Brazen in their approach, you’d forget that the transactions were illegal. Their openness and enthusiasm for consuming the happy medicine amuses me. In the most hedonistic of acts they seem determined as a collective to drain the resources completely dry. “Yolo” and “Fuck it!” thrown around as toasts to the volume thrown down their throats.
They barely take any persuading to move up to the farm in the morning, those that have stricter homes and curfews already having left to catch the only bus to the nearest train station in the early hours. “Ain’t no one expecting me,” smiles one boy, with his arms wrapped around two girls in a state of undress. Daddy’s special rocks had the desired effect, inhibitions don’t exist in their world right now.
They look to Daddy as their leader, the provider of what they desire. They look to him with collective reverence. “We have vast fields up there, you can camp for as long as you like, stay as long as you choose. Let’s keep the party going.” The last message received with a cheer and a gentle scramble to begin gathering belongings.
Our little flock, voluntarily making their own way up to our forever home. Daddy takes them the long way, so as to avoid prying eyes. We don’t use the main entrance but come via the very fields being offered. Fields that they quickly set up in, sharing food, making their camp for the night and eagerly awaiting the promised batch of new supplies in the morning; Daddy waving away any offer of money.
“My gift to you,” he smiles, further increasing the adoration beaming from the congregation.
I clap with glee as Daddy carries me up the field towards home, the cosy cottage with our big bed, welcomed after a night of revelry. “Oh Daddy,” I squeal, safely out of hearing distance, “they’re going to be so happy here. We can train them and breed them and make them such an obedient flock. They’re quite obedient already and so excited for everything!”
“Yes, my Blade.” Daddy says softly, “This is exactly what I’ve been seeking. Good, docile animals to show you the gift of life. We can start straight away, I’m prepared and they’re even better than I could imagine” He looks over the at the bulls in their cages, rampant and pawing at the ground.
“Yes,” Daddy goes on, “This is the simplicity I want for us. We have our flock gathered my Darkling. Now real farm life can begin. All under my charge.”
“Fetch me another one.”
That’s what Daddy said to me. The last words he’ll ever say to me.
Soon you’ll be dead. The voice calls out from the darkness of my mind. The beast is awake again.
Chill bites at my skin. It burns to touch. Shivering, I try my best to wrap myself up warm in my little princess dress. My ballet shoes are little protection against the white frosted ground.
I did as he bid. I went into the cold to get Daddy another body. “A small one, yay high.” I remember him measuring his hand up against me – shoulder height. So I’d know exactly how tall the next one should be.
The next piece in Daddy’s grand master piece.
“We’ll build the most beautiful toy.” Daddy explained to me with wide gesturing arms. I didn’t quite understand his vision. A big ball of snow. A world made by us for our own pleasure. It sounded magical. My Daddy is magical. He can do whatever he sets his mind to.
Then why isn’t he here for you now? Taunts from the dark.
I won’t give up on him. It wasn’t pretend. He loves me, I know it. He will protect me, I believe it. My Daddy will save me. Just like he always does. He saved me from the boys, from the toxic city and from the freezing cold of our yard. He will save me now.
It should only have taken a minute. Open the door, leave the latch on and run into the cold to retrieve one from our secret store.
Silly girl forgot the latch.
With a crack the door closed behind me, taking the warmth and light of our home with it. Leaving me here in the freezing cold.
“How long has it been?” I mutter to myself as another dizzy sway takes hold.
Hunching down even smaller I realise that my fingers have turned that beautiful blue of our captured creatures. I am blending in with the meat that hangs from the hooks above. Faint blue shadows swaying the breeze.
You’ll be one of them soon. My fate declared by the night.
“Shut up!” I croak with a misty cough. I’m just doing a Daddy trick. I’m camouflaging myself. Keeping myself safe from the monsters in the dark while Daddy comes to rescue me.
I can still see you… We see you suffering.
“Shut up!” I mouth silently. My voice taken by the freezing cold.
My vision blurs and flickers. The dark shapes of swaying trees and monsters and glittering eyes spark in and out of view.
In a heartbeat I am back in the yard, back under the jets of freezing water. How did I get here?
There’s Daddy, pointing the hose at me, washing my sins away. A baptism of agony.
Looking down, the clumps of the dead wash away with the blood. Is that my blood? Is my flesh falling off? I don’t feel myself anymore. How did I get here?
I can’t stop it, I can’t stop him and he doesn’t stop.
Why won’t he stop?
The track replays, the freezing water, the feeling of helplessness, deeper and deeper I’m consumed by the memory. It plays on and on, a living nightmare. I’m there again and I can’t get out.
The pain is unbearable. The cold bites at my everything, I feel my skin cracking, my lips splitting open.
Why is Daddy hurting me? Why is my Daddy hurting me?
Closing my eyes has no impact, the vision still rolls on. Daddy reigning his arctic blast of a lesson over my fragile skin. I feel my bones shatter.
Why is my Daddy hurting me?
“You’ve seen this before.” the voice whispers, the beast has a different prey these days.
Or is it a different beast all together?
“You’ve seen it in how he treats them, the pets, the worthless meat-sacks. What makes you think you’re any better? That you’re different? That he won’t discard you like the poor fools who fail at his tasks?”
I’m failing. I’m failing right now. I failed.
How could Daddy hurt me?
“And this is how you die.” The voice explains as I’m stuck between two worlds, each with an all consuming painful delirium. I fight against the jets of water, flailing my hands in front of me, but it has no impact on the memory, the blast continues on.
“I took everything for Daddy.” I reassure myself, he loved me with his fists, tore me with his teeth and ripped me open with hardness that ached for days. I bled, screamed and suffered for him. Now I die for him.
Maybe then I’ll be good enough.
“Blade!” I hear Daddy’s roar from afar. White light blinds me. A warmth burns my skin. “Blade! The latch! I said…” I hear his sermon booming out loud above the tinkling voices of angels. “You could have died locked in the chiller.”
I shrug. “As it is meant to be.” I try to tell the vision in front of my eyes. The cold steals my words. My lips crack. I can’t even cry. It doesn’t matter anyway, figments of my twisted imagination have no hearing, no sympathy.
Unable to fight, even as warm hands scoop me up, I succumb to the cold.
I watch Daddy at work from the comfort of my nest, wrapped up in a thick woolly blanket next to the golden roaring fire. Every inch of me is covered in woollen clothing, I’m the epitome of mollycoddled.
He works with fast hands and deft fingers. My Daddy is so clever, building a whole new world just for us. Perhaps this world will be better, the last one was painful… I remember.
At least, I thought I did. Like the memory is just out of my reach.
I remember something, something I’ll need to think about soon.
Something I don’t want to recall.
I’m scared, although I don’t know what of.
Don’t think of it, just be good.
My heart races and I listen hard to the man’s actions, stacking lumps of flesh into the glass globe. I don’t know who he is, but I know him.
Do I know him?
“Ta da….!” He turns around with a flourish and hits a button at the bottom of the creation. Little frosty flakes mingle with glitter inside the glass bauble, they float around the human shapes, frozen in time and expression.
“It’s a snow globe Blade. A little family in a magical world. Just for you.”
Blade. That’s me. But that’s not my name.
What is my name? What was my name?
This is not my house and the people in that globe are not my family.
I’m a long way from home. I think.
How did I get here?
I want to go home. I think.
How did I get here?
“Thank you Daddy.” are the words that leave my mouth. Scripted words, pre-determined, my auto-response to his stimulus.
He beams at me. “That’s my good girl.”
I relaxed. Comforted. The backing track of distraction, of the thing I must remember and yet don’t wish to, can’t wish to, can’t cope with; the source for the crippling anxiety that wrenches my gut and screams to run, it melts away.
From within there is a silence, a proverbial lid closing, a heavy steel box with top firmly closed, never to be shifted. Was there some kind of animal here..? He is caged now.
That is all I must know. That I am good. That I am a girl. Just a girl with no cares in the world.
I am Daddy’s girl.
It is my part in this act and I commit to the role, I know the script and I read along. I do as he asks. I part my legs as he moves towards me, ready to take my praise and gratitude. I give it, bountifully, appreciative for the silence he affords. This man, who built this world just for me.
I need to be careful with this one.
Careful and clever.
The last one made Daddy angry so we didn’t get to keep it anymore. Daddy loved him until he was all gone. I know it’s what the pet would have wanted, really, deep down. His body showed how much he liked it, hard in his boy parts and parting with a smile.
I didn’t get to explain that I wanted to keep him, just a little bit. I’m not allowed to think that so I don’t. I don’t think it and I never, ever say it. Even when I feel it. Even when it’s not fair that Daddy breaks my toys.
This time if I want to play I must get permission like a good girl. Or maybe I can make Daddy want to play too, so that I can. Daddy barely pays attention to the pets unless they’re bad or he’s teaching me a lesson. I get all of his loving and Daddy treats because I’m his good girl. I do deserve it all, I do.
The cage looks quite cosy, actually. It’s next to the fire and Daddy even put a soft blanket in there. “We look after our pets.” he explained. He sets me a good example of compassion.
He catches me looking at the cage, tucked into the nook of his arm snuggled up on the sofa. It’s dark again. It’s noisier when it’s dark. Noisy in my head. Daddy’s reading me a story so I have something else to listen to. The low rumble of my Daddy’s narration drowns it out.
His pause indicates I should be listening to him. Turning my face up to him with a smile I nod for him to continue “Please Daddy.” I tune back into his words, idly picking the blood out from under my nails. We had a good hunt today.
Calmer in his arms and with the fairy stories working their magic, I relax. I trail my hand up towards Daddy’s fuzzy face and stroke his beard. My hand gently cups his jaw and moves in time with the words, Daddy’s throwing himself into character, roaring when the dragon does and imitating the squeaky little voice of the mouse.
It soothes the beast.
The story complete I whisper, almost inaudible “I’m sorry for the beast Daddy, it was hungry. I couldn’t stop…” I trail off, catching my lip wobbling at my failings. The black beast within clawing for control as I falter in confidence.
He shakes his head, ignoring the words directly and moving on, speaking aloud, “Time for your bath little lady.” Daddy scoops me up as his stands, wrapping my legs around his waist to carry me to the bathroom.
He returns my whisper. “Daddy will teach you. We will tame that beast. We will show it that you are mine.” His words having instant affect, my breathing shallowing and girl parts grinding hungrily against the firmness of his hip. He feels it.
Louder now he tells me “I made you Blade. Don’t you think Daddy’s beast had to be tamed?” A flash of it showing in his eyes, reflected back in lustful energy. His beast burns a vibrant red of furious desire.
Sometimes I think they speak to one another, his beast and mine. Through our gazes they see one another. Sometimes, when Daddy takes me, I feel them connect. That’s when I wake up the most bruised and cut. That’s when Daddy bites down the most viciously. That’s when Daddy pounds me the hardest, relentlessly until I pass out in a blissful haze of pleasure and pain. Those are the times I want again and again.
But… but sometimes my beast gets out even when I don’t want it to. I can’t always control it. Even Daddy’s best words do little to cage the beast as it grows stronger. Those are the times I never want, waking up with hazy memory, a full stomach and Daddy’s anger.
“I am in control Blade.” Daddy’s words cut through my thoughts and bring me back to the present. “I have a lesson for you. To show you how. We’ll take it slowly, reign that beast in little by little until he can’t hurt you anymore.” The intensity of Daddy’s stare matched by kisses that consume me. I’m breathless by the time he places me on the floor and starts the bath taps running.
In lighter tone Daddy’s attention turns back to the task at hand. “But right now my sweet darkling, a bath! Let’s get you all clean!” the intensity momentarily making way for bath time fun.
“Bubbles?” he asks? I nod enthusiastically. “Duckie?” he queries next, again to more furious nods. “And this?” he continues, holding a big pink loafer aloft. “Yes!” I squeal with more accompanying nodding.
“Daddy?” I ask gently, pushing to see how open he’ll be to my request. “Please may my pet come too?”
I see his eyes narrow, focusing on me. I feel his gaze bury into me, reading my mind.
“I just want to bathe her…” I say nervously, “…it. Just to keep it clean and…” I search for his words, “…to look after it. Like you showed me to!” I add brightly.
It’s the tiniest of tells, the curve at the edge of his lip, the not quite smile that speaks volumes of adoration, the one that waits for me to ask nicely, to ask as I’ve been taught, to ask anything of him and he shall deliver.
“OK.” He says with note of caution in his voice. “To wash it, only. No rough play!” Daddy sets the boundaries. “It can’t handle a beast.” His words firm and telling.
As quick as the wink that accompanies his words, Daddy returns to playful “Especially not a beast as devious as Duckie!” he chuckles.
I bounce and wriggle out of Daddy’s hands, eager to go and collect my little creature. I hear Daddy’s laugh as I scramble to floor to release the lock.
She takes a little coaxing at first. They all do at first. It takes some persuasion and that special soft voice that Daddy taught me. It takes wide eyes and a feigned frightened smile. Eventually, with the false sense of trust I garner by removing the shackles, they begin to believe and follow like little lambs to the slaughter.
Bouncing back into the bathroom I see the bath is bulging with big white bubbles! I clap my hands with excitement. My pet flinches involuntarily.
Quickly I drop my dress and remove the small set of panties from my pet. She obeys like a good girl and I pet her as a reward. “Such a good pet!” Happiness beams from my everything.
“Bath time!” Daddy booms from behind us, re-entering the room. I squeal in excitement as he swoops down and picks us both up with ease.
“Eeeeeeeeeeeee!” my excitement is uncontrollable as Daddy holds us above the bubbly mass.
“Deep breath!” he commands with a cheeky grin before dunking us both firmly under the warm water.
I resurface with a whoop and laughter. Daddy plays the funniest tricks. Pet comes up shortly after, coughing and spluttering.
“Silly pet, you will have to learn!” I say, wiping the bubbles out of her eyes.
The water soothes my bruises and aching joints. It seems to relax her too, eventually even letting out a little smile as we play with Duckie.
I like her smile. I want it.
My girl parts twitch as the beast stirs within.
We want it.
We want to rip it off her face.
I wink at Daddy and slide a little closer to my pet. With an innocent smile I play a little closer, diving Duckie under the water. I smile at her, my most beautiful smile. She smiles back, the nurturing water breaking down her walls.
Daddy sits back and melts into the background but I still feel him watching me.
I like it when he watches me. When I must perform for him. His little actress.
I let my soft wet skin rub up against hers and let out a quiet laugh and giggle as I splash her a little. I let my body speak words of encouragement. Silent words of enticement.
The water laps up between us as I move in and take a kiss from her quivering lips. I match her inhale of surprise and play her like a puppet.
“Shhh…” I urge her with a finger to her lips. Fingers that trace down over her supple breasts and down below the bubbles. I find her pulsing cunt with ease and slide my slender fingers inside.
She takes it and gives herself to the moment. The animal drive for pleasure overriding her fear.
My free hand instinctively holds the back of her neck, reinforcing my control and allowing me the grip I need. I see it play out in my mind. My clever little hands bringing her on. Drawing out her pleasure and urging her closer and closer to climax. I imagine the feeling of her cunt clenching and convulsing in rhythm to my strokes and thrusts. I see her face blush and her breathing shallow as she gropes for release. I imagine how her face will look as she closes her eyes tight, reaching for that orgasm, the one I hold off just out of reach.
I hear her panting and the sound of the water making waves from her bucking hips. I smile to myself as I think how surprised she will be when I force her under the water. The confusion and gurgled scream as she cums hard, drowning with each wave of pleasure and involuntary breath.
“Good girl.” I growl quietly.
Good girl, the beast growls inside.
“Blade.” Daddy’s firm command cuts through the hotness, halting me just as I am about to plunge her down.
My pet freezes in my hands, juddering as she tries to wrestle against the orgasm, fearing Daddy’s intervention.
Mine, the beast growls.
I struggle to stop my hands working her cunt. She squirms under my hold, doing everything she can to hold off.
“Blade.” Daddy’s words repeat. The instruction is obvious… Stop.
MINE!! The beast roars, making my head swim.
“Yes, Sir.” I say weakly, my energy expended from wrestling control of my mind.
My hands come to rest and relax, softly cupping her under the water, holding still inside. The pet whimpers, caught between insatiable desire for release and the relief that I have stopped.
“Shut up and cum already.” Daddy growls at the girl. Immediately she climaxes hard around my fingers. I feel the hot jet of her piss and cum rush over my hand.
My cunt responds and I am overwhelmed with a sudden orgasm of my own.
“Good girl.” His words float through the air as he lifts me out of the water and enters me. Daddy treats as a reward for passing his lesson.
Daddy is in control. He will tame my beast.